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She refused to tell me the names of the other men, but agreed to delete her account.I assumed that meant we were on the path to repairing our marriage. She threatened divorce and told me how miserable it was being married to me.It was as though I was talking to a complete stranger, some bohemian. “I triggered hard.” People are surprised to hear about men whose wives are on Ashley Madison.Typically, guys are considered the philanderers — actively going out pursuing affairs — while women get hit on and reactively decide whether to cheat. Sure, the hack revealed that only 14 percent of Ashley Madison’s users were women.He still speaks to his mother, but has a hard time dealing with what happened. I admit it and I’m working toward being a better person.” I’m currently looking for a new job in the tech world, and you can bet that I’m going to look up any potential new boss to see if they were on Ashley Madison — anyone who would lie to his or her spouse would lie to me.Being divorced after nearly two decades of marriage because my wife was cheating on me on a site like Ashley Madison wasn’t the future I had envisioned.Matthew is a successful, 48-year-old tech executive living outside of San Francisco.
If you’d read the actual study, you would see that the dudes trying to score were actually investigators who probably had no game and made poor or awkward attempts at landing women.Not only was I reminded of the torture of discovering that my life partner, now 48, was cheating on a site that flat-out condoned extramarital affairs, but suddenly I could read the profiles my wife, who used the pseudonym Sophia, created during her two stints on Ashley Madison.She paid to have each permanently deleted, but clearly, the company did no such thing.Her profile, “attached female seeking male,” read: “Not looking to blow up my life …I am looking to stretch my wings a bit and fly a bit farther.” My wife, to put it bluntly, was a cold fish in bed throughout our nearly two decades of marriage, so it was devastating to see her explicit fantasies laid out there so unabashedly.